eHarmony
Today I was talking with Karen and Bethany and Karen asked me if I was happy to be single again. The innocuous question caught me off guard and I answered in the negative, trying to contain my surprise. The timing of the question was interesting because over the last few weeks I had been reflecting a lot upon companionship and what it’s like to share your life with someone else. I miss it…a lot. It was one of the most special things I had ever seen and it blew me away. It was also mighty difficult to give up. Now I see it as something both to pursue and worth waiting for. As a man, I should look for and initiate it, but not find my happiness in it. Since I live in an area with a relatively small Christian dating pool, a couple weeks ago I went so far as to check out eHarmony. I filled out their free personality survey and received 12 matches, but couldn’t see photos or communicate with any of them without joining. After some mental debate last week, I finally decided to join when they agreed to throw in some free added subscription time.
I have no idea what will become of this, but just reading the profiles of my matches has been refreshing. The quality of many of the women who sign up for the site is at another level (outside of the girl from PA who put herself as the most influential person in her life). Most of the initial matches have fallen by the wayside, but it has been encouraging to send and receive the initial questions and answers. I am realizing that, while in Argentina, it was impossible for me to move on from my breakup because too much of my relation to the country was tied to my dating relationship. It took physical separation to be able to accept and finalize a choice I had made months earlier. While there, too much of me still wanted to ignore that choice and hope it went away. This may sound strange, but having only dated someone from another country, part of me wondered if I’d ever be able to understand and date an American girl. Even the simple act of finishing the healing by beginning again here in the U.S. is huge. It has shown me that there are women here too who can understand me and are looking for the same things. You just have to look hard for them.
